Hello friends and intrepid travelers of the Internet! This is a guest-blogger series that spends entirely too much time theorizing who'd win in a fight: Godzilla or The Incredible Hulk. Our first guest, Graham Skipper, began yesterday with a look at both combatants. You can check that out here. Now, to quote Ken Watanabe, "Gotham must burn." Wait no I mean "Let them fight."
A cool Tokyo morning. The sun rises over Shinjuku Station on what would normally be a morning bustling with salarymen and tourists ogling at the neon signs and electronic music of video arcades and pachinko parlors.
But not today, because in preparation for what will surely be the battle of the century, Tokyo has been completely evacuated. A sparse military presence maintains a strict perimeter around the city, letting nobody in as the world waits for the fight to begin...
The Hulk is PISSED. The Avengers and the Fantastic Four are all off fighting The Brood in the Shi’ar Galaxy, leaving him to take care of business back on Earth. And that business, it would seem, is destroying Godzilla. Most everyone else has fought the gigantic primordial monster before, but never Hulk. But Reed Richards radioed in the morning to tell Banner that his subterranean seismic sensors indicated that Godzilla was waking up, and heading straight for Tokyo.
“Once in a while,” Richards had said, “Godzilla just wakes up to cleanse the planet. He may just be doing what he’s supposed to do, but lives are at risk. You have to stop him.”
Water begins to swirl in Tokyo Harbor. A deep groan emits from the earth as the ground shakes and large waves begin to lap inland. Soon, huge bony spikes start to rise from the water, followed by dark, rough, scaly green hide. A huge tail whips ferociously free from the waves, and the head of the beast soon stands at full height...
300 feet tall, at least. Stretching, as if awakening from a decades-long slumber, Godzilla roars into the morning air. The sonic blast alone shatters windows for fifty blocks. Hulk quickly climbs to the top of the 1500 foot Tokyo Skytree to get a better view. Damn, this lizard’s huge. Godzilla, however, has not yet noticed Hulk. For once, Hulk is the puny one.
No time for thinking, Hulk says to himself. Time to smash.
The Hulk leaps from his perch and bounds from skyscraper to skyscraper, taking off chunks of concrete with every footfall, hurrying towards Godzilla as Big Green just begins to climb onto land.
Godzilla begins by decimating a large fifty-story hotel on the waterfront, pounding it to the foundation with his gargantuan fists, not noticing the (relatively) tiny green speck hurtling through the air towards him.
SLAM! The Hulk smashes into Godzilla’s head, a sucker punch of epic proportions, that sends Godzilla stumbling off-balance down the street. Hulk hangs on and continues punching into the side of Godzilla’s head, causing the giant lizard to see stars. What is this strange pest?
The lizard has difficulty swatting the bug away with his arms, but soon uses his long tail to whip away the annoyance. Hulk falls to the ground, leaving a crater in the cement as he comes to an abrupt stop. As the dust clears, he looks up to see an enraged Godzilla peering down.
Then, a foot. An enormous foot the size of a city block totally blotting out the sun as it descends on top of Hulk. Hulk puts up his hands but the foot is too huge, even for a hero like The Hulk, and soon it squashes him.
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BRBRCK is a rapper and producer (and blogger, obviously) based in Brooklyn, NY. Check out his musical stylings here.